Mai zinda hu

Ok, the last time I posted something here was the time when Shah Jahan was approving the budget for the Taj or maybe when Noah was building his arc to save the humanity. But I have only sheer lethargy and my lazy bum attitude to blame for this absence.

Countless things happened during this time. Bangalore lost the IPL 2.0 final, Congress got re-elected at the centre, I relaxed at home for a fortnight, India had a disastrous T20, celebrated the silver jubilee of my life, met some new friends, lost touch with a few old ones, made plans for a new business venture then forgot everything about it, lost a very close relative and of course stole some more stationary from the office.

Overall, it has been a pretty smooth and a straight forward journey in the last 6 months except for few minor hiccups here n there. What brings me back to this blog site is the last week. One, a friend who used to read this blog regularly literally threatened to show me Himesh Reshammiya's 'Karzzzzzz' and 'Aap ka suroor' back to back unless I posted something. I also had an opportunity to have a very close and dear friend of mine in Bangalore. Abhijeet came here for some official work and hence could stay at my place for 4 days. Our friendship dates back to our school days some 10 years ago and as opposed to a common fate that most school friendships see, our bond of friendship kept on growing stronger and stronger by the day. Seeing each other grow from the then school pranksters to the matured and responsible guys that we are today (OK! Not so matured) has been a journey in itself. And the best part is, next month he takes the next and the most important step in his life. I wish him a wonderful life ahead.

Now coming back to me :). I completed 2 years with my current employer on the 15th of this month (apparently the same day when Sachin completed his 20 years in International Cricket) and that made me think “Sahi yaar! 2 saal tik gaya. Ab kya?”. Given my history especially the education related part of it, sometimes even I wonder that how in the world have I survived here! Basically, I am not a technologically motivated person and am least bothered about understanding how a blackberry can be connected to a computer or for that matter to dishwasher using just Java (ugggggh!). I have seen people around me trying different things one after the other. Sometimes the reason is frustration and sometimes it is the sense of adventure. For me, I am neither frustrated with what I am doing (not that I adore it), nor I have courage to take the plunge in an unknown territory altogether. I can therefore conclude that exactly 1 year later, I’ll be saying “Sahi yaar! 3 saal tik gaya. Ab kya?” And as far as people say that one should be driving one’s life, all I can say is “(Yawwwn!) Yeah that’s true. I’ll think about it (Yawwwn!)”

Anyway, ab time pass band karta hu. Wishes to Ankit, Harsh, Juhi, Siddhi, Amardeep, Himanshu and Abhijeet for their marriages in this order respectively. With so many friends getting married in a period of 1 month, I suddenly feel like dancing on the street on the tunes of “Aaj mere yaar ki shaadi hai” played by "The New Darbar Band".

Adios Amigos!

The only God I believe in!

"Nothing bad can happen to us if we're on a plane in India with him on the same plane." - Hashim Amla.

"Sometimes you get so engrossed in watching him bat you lose focus on your job." - Yaseer Hameed

"To the man we all want to be" - What Andrew Symonds wrote on an aussie t-shirt

"I HAVE SEEN GOD, HE BATS AT NO.4 FOR INDIA" - Matthew Hayden

"Beneath the helmet, under that unruly curly hair, inside the cranium, there is something we don't know, something beyond scientific measure. Something that allows him to soar, to roam a territory of sport that, forget us, even hose who are gifted enough to play alongside him cannot even fathom. When he goes out to bat, people switch on their TV sets and switch off their lives" - BBC

"Tuzhe pata hai tune kiska catch chhoda hai?" - Wasim Akram to Abdul Razzaq when the latter dropped his catch.

"He is a genius. I'm a mere mortal.”- Brian Charles Lara

"We did not lose to a team called India...we lost to a man called Sachin" - Mark Taylor, during the test match in Chennai (1997)

"The more I see of him the more confused I'm getting to which is his best knock." - M. L. Jaisimha.

"The joy he brings to the millions of his countrymen, the grace with which he handles all the adulation and the expectations and his innate humility - all make for a one-in-a-billion individual." - McGrath

"I can be hundred per cent sure that he will not play for a minute longer when he is not enjoying himself. He is still so eager to go out there and play. He will play as long as he feels he can play." – Wife Anjali

"I am fortunate that I've to bowl at him only in the nets!" - KUMBLE

Que: Who do you think as most important celebrity ?

Shahrukh: There was a big party where stars from bollywood and cricket were invited. Suddenly, there was a big noise, all wanted to see approaching Amitabh Bachhan. Then he entered the hall and Amitabh was leading the queue to get a grab of the GENIUS!!

"India me aap PrimeMinister ko ek Baar Katghare me khada kar sakte hain..Par is insaan par ungli nahi utha Sakte" – Navjot Singh Sidhu

"He can play that leg glance with a walking stick also." - Waqar Younis

"He has often reminded me of a veteran army colonel who has many medals on his chest to show how he has conquered bowlers all over the world" - Allan Donald

"I was bowling to him and he hit me for two fours in a row. One from point and the other in between point and gully. That was the last two balls of the over and the over after that we (SA) took a wicket and during the group meeting i told Jonty (Rhodes) to be alert and i know a way to pin him. And i delivered the first ball of my next over and it was a fuller length delevery outside offstump. And i shouted catch. To my astonishment the ball was hit to the cover boundary. Such is his brilliance. His reflex time is the best i have ever seen. Its like 1/20th of a sec. To get his wicket better not prepare. Atleast u wont regret if he hits you for boundaries." - Allan Donald

"On a train from Shimla to Delhi, there was a halt in one of the stations. The train stopped by for few minutes as usual. He was nearing century, batting on 98. The passengers, railway officials, everyone on the train waited for him to complete the century. This Genius can stop time in India!!" - Peter Rebouck - Aussie journalist

"There are 2 kind of batsmen in the world. One Sachin Tendulkar. Two all the others." - Andy Flower

A banner once said - ' I WILL SEE GOD WHEN I DIE BUT TILL THEN I WILL SEE SACHIN'

Food for Thought

This caption on a bike left me dumbfounded. What was he trying to convey? Anyone has an answer?

A (Holi) Day to remember

After a long and relaxing vacation which constituted a strict regime of stupendous meals, inhuman sleeping hours and a constant urge of playing cricket; I am now back in Bang. Instead of a long boring post, I would rather write this in a bulleted format.

• On the beautiful morning of 20th December, I woke up before time justified by the sheer excitement of going home. In the wee hours of this day, I was off to the airport. Accompanied by an old friend, I insisted on taking the aisle seat when we boarded the flight hoping that there is some turbulence, the air-hostess loses her balance, falls in my lap and hence we end up living happily ever after. But then, there is something called destiny. I ended up in the middle seat, with my friend on my right and on my left, a 70 yearish old uncle with snow-white hair who kept on complaining to the hostess about the amount of refreshments they serve. Not to mention he ended up gobbling 4 juice packs, 3 meal cartons and countless water bottles.

• The moment flight gates were finally opened, there was Indore everywhere. Suddenly I heard a voice saying “Array bhiya, jara aggay le le yaar” (Oh Brother! Please move it a bit in the front). This was a man guiding the driver of the mobile staircase. I headed towards the conveyor to get my luggage. As I proceeded to get a strolley from the stand, a young man standing there said “Bhiya vo baylt ke side mein lagi he traali” (Brother, there is a trolley right next to the conveyor belt). I was just thankful that I didn’t hear the air hostess saying “Peeche wali savari peeche se or aggay wali aggay se niklo. Ye aakhiri ishtaap hega”. (People in the back get out of the back gate and people in the front get out from front gate. This is the last stop). I was totally Indored.

• We immediately left for Bhopal as we had to attend the marriage reception of an old colleague (That’s why my friend had accompanied me). When we reached the venue, my “antar aatma” posed me 2 questions which had no relation to each other. First, was this really her? With loads of makeup the bride looked so different from what I remembered but then I think that’s the whole point. The most special day of one’s life, one has to look special too and I have to admit, she did look beautiful. I wish her a great life ahead. Secondly, am I getting old? The origin of this question lies in the fact that till now, off all the marriages that I have attended, they’ve either been of a distant cousin or of some acquaintance or other such elderly figures. But this was the first time, when I attended the marriage of a friend as a friend. This really made me feel much older. However, I also believe that wine and wisdom get better with age. I’ve seen the wine, its wisdom’s turn now.

• I stayed in Dewas for a longer stretch this time and cherished the opportunity to visit my Alma Mater. I was amazed to see some major infrastructural changes in my school after 6 years but the sight that caught my attention was that of my teachers who really looked old now. Unfortunately, some of them could not recognize me. They tried to justify it by saying that I have inflated much more than Satyam’s balance sheets over the years. I account it to their old ages and loss of memory.

• My mom kept on requesting me to take a look at the “Developments” in Dewas. I successfully dodged the request when I was asked to bring ‘bhindis’ from the new and first ‘Reliance Mart’ in Dewas. But then I was physically tortured, when I refused to accompany her for a show of ‘Rab ne Bana di Jodi’ in the state of the art ‘Adlabs’. Just 1 experience in the premises will show you how sophisticated Dewas is. My mom brought the highest standards of safety and security measures being followed to my notice when she pointed towards a long queue of people being frisked by the security staff for any possible bombs, guns or other ‘Weapons of Mass Destruction’. When observed carefully, I noticed that people were being frisked not for bombs or guns; but for tobacco pouches, betel nuts etc. That’s Dewas for you.

• As always, I spent quality time with some of my college friends. Surprisingly, there were no booze guzzling sessions, irresponsible hap-hazard drunken driving or puke plethora this time. Instead, deep long conversations accompanied by other responsible behavioral traits have simply made these meetings memorable.

• I also saw myself settling (Important notice: This ‘settling’ should not be even remotely misunderstood to getting married) in Indore. Somewhere down the line, it is Indore where I would love to spend my life. Being closer to family is another plus. After all, I am the “budhaape ka sahara” (snobbish smile accompanied) for my parents. On a serious note, I have always loved this city, I still love this city and I see no reason why I’d stop loving it. Still have a lot to think about the “When’s, What’s and How’s”.

• Cherry on top was the 1 day I got to spend with my chuddy buddies in Mumbai. We met after a goliath gap of 11 months when once there were times, when we used to spend 11 hours a day with each other. All of us have been working professionals for 2 years now but once we meet, all are 17 year olds again. The sheer magnitude of fun we have is at times out of normal human comprehension levels. Looking forward to meet you guys again. Soon.

In a nutshell, I did everything one wants to do when at home on a vacation. Getting up late, reading news paper in the sun on a chilly morning, unending sessions of tea and conversation, playing long cricket matches, homemade food on demand and most importantly, the feeling of being with my family. For me, that’s what vacations are all about.

Homecoming

After 7 long boring and uneventful months, it’s finally time to go home. But more than my project manager who approved my 2 week vacation, I need to thank those Wall Street financial honchos who created such mayhem in the global markets, forcing us to take up our leaves before the year ends. As a result, I am now in a position to step in to the new year with my friends and family after 4 long years.

In a Border style dialogue, “20 December ko, subah ka nashta Bangalore mein karenge, beech ka time pass hawa mein aur dopahar ka khaana Indore mein.” Those 3 hours in the sky would carry me from a world of deadlines, tasks, updates, reports and meetings to one of my parent’s smiles and the simplistic life in Dewas. So people, pray that a girl sits next to me on the flight and ask god to make her pretty, single and "Telephone-number-exchanging" kind of a girl.

Going home for holidays has always been exciting for countless reasons. I love the expression on my mom’s face when she sees my 3 week unshaved face with irritation. Surprisingly, every time I go home, mom feels that I have lost some weight despite the fact that I have bloated exponentially over the years because of obvious reasons. I think that is the pure love of a mother. Dad is happy too but is also worried about his car which I always borrow from him and return with a scratch. (Not that I am a bad driver, but again, obvious reasons)

I think that the people who are happiest to see me in Indore/ Dewas are the owners of various small eateries, restaurants etc. because during my vacations, their sales almost surpass the combined GDP of Botswana and Mozambique. And there is nothing new in it. I’ve been following this rigorous routine for quite some time now. This may sound a little geeky but I have a dedicated MS Excel file on my system with a list of all such eating joints which I am supposed to cover and a check box in front of each (Multiple check boxes in special cases). Given the fact that I am a huge foodie, a great admirer of street food, more than happy to relish those delicacies even on my deathbed, that Excel is completely justified.

Once again, I will meet my hip-hop-hyper active extended family which has a gamut of people from different age groups and most importantly everyone is ready for a party, a get together 24x7. Special mention to the one and only Mr. X, with whom I have not only planned visits to the exotic pubs in Indore (Refer ‘The Boozer’s Diary’ for Mr. X) but a lot more.

And all the fun I am going to have with my dost log is something that has always been unprecedented and this time too……will be the same.

Mai aa raha hu MAA

Shaken and Awaken

After 3 busy and hectic weeks, I finally have some time to breathe and come up with another post. But so much has happened in the last 3 weeks that now I am all confused about what to write. I know that a lot has already been written about the Mumbai attacks but I am left with no choice.

Until 26th November 2008, India had more or less seen a typical pattern of terror attacks throughout the country. Bombs placed in bikes and then remotely detonated. But seeing gangs of armed Jihadis with grenades, Ak47s taking the police head on, killing off the senior officials, breaching two of India’s flagship hotels (one being a World Heritage), causing carnage at one of the biggest train station of the country and taking hostages is something that was totally new for us. It could have been accomplished only through an unprecedented level of planning, coordination and training complemented and most importantly a certain level of confidence in their ability to be successful.

Usually an attack of such a magnitude in India is usually given about 30 seconds of TV time on channels like CNN and BBC. But this time, our Jihadi friends have explicitly targeted “Western” people thus signaling their intention to be “heard” at the top of the hour. And so this time, the US stations were full of it leading with a headline of “Terrorists control Mumbai” which seemed quite apt too. It’s really sad because it reflects the general cluelessness of the West in understanding the geopolitics of the situation. One of my colleagues from Germany when heard about this heinous act did 2 things. First, condemned the terrorist attack and then wondered why Indian government is so adamant on having Kashmir as a part of India. “Why don’t you just give them Kashmir and put an end to all this”. From her point of view, she may be right because she lives in a country which has seen the WORST wars in human history and it is now imbibed in their blood that any war is bad. Unfortunately what she doesn’t know is that the terrorist attacks in India are rarely related to Kashmir any more as was admitted by the lone surviving terrorist himself.

Anyway, coming back to India, I must say that I have never ever seen such a sorry state of politicians in our country. (May be HD Devegowda, ‘The Sleeping Beauty’ qualifies here). A highly uninspiring Prime Minister, a pathetic President and I am not even bothering to discuss the others. When I heard the statements made by many such high profile politicos, I was nothing but embarrassed. Also, seeing the politicians resign after the event is not something that attracts my attention. Say one day, I go and kill my company’s CEO and the next day say “I take moral responsibility for my actions hence from tomorrow, I will no longer work in the company”. This is pretty much what has happened here. Though not directly involved, I feel that the government and political apathy towards previous such incidents virtually makes them as big a terrorist as any other.

One other visual which startled me was that during the early hours of encounter the police personnel were trying to confront the terrorists with 303 rifles (For those who are not aware, 303 rifle was developed in England in 1880!) Another embarrassment! I sincerely hope that the Indian government thinks about it and provides our armed forces, the police included with some respectable arms.

Some visuals and statements that really moved me during the ordeal came from some of the NSG commandos. What I felt on seeing the commandos coming out of the Taj, after a 60 hour long ordeal and boarding a BEST bus (Government cannot even provide them a personal vehicle) is something I cannot describe in words. Tired bodies, unshaved faces and smiling while eating biscuits from a pack handed over by a reporter. Goosebumpy! Some statements: “Hamaare liye kuch mushkil nahi hai ji”, “Array sir, ye smile hi to hai jo kuch bhi hai. Aisi problem to aati rehti hai, morale down nahi hona chahiye bas”. Really simple words, great thoughts.

Finally, the only positive thing I saw coming out of this, is the way our country has responded. Never have I seen the entire country in one voice. Unfortunately it happens only at the times of such national crisis and is short lived. I just hope that not only this feeling continues, but we create a safe atmosphere for us and everyone else around.

Proud to be an Indian!

The cat roared again

2.76 lakh applicants, 2.4 lakh aspirants, 1800 seats, 23 centers, 7 IIM’s, 2.5 hours, 1 question paper. I can’t drill it down any further because what happens next is completely between the aspirant and his own mind. I have been following this ruthless yet magnificent exam for last 6 years now. CAT is known for surprises just as the family. Something changes every time. Yet the one thing that has remained same over the years is the immense craze for this particular exam. Each year the number of applicants for CAT just keeps on increasing and at a very healthy rate too. In 2005, when I first appeared for CAT, 1.47 lakh applicants; which has almost doubled in 4 years. Reason? I don’t know. It can be different for different people. A perfect career choice, a topic of discussion, business, a way of life, a routine… who knows.

Personally, I think of it as a front where I have to prove my worth at least once. I do not have to admit this because everyone who has seen me over the years will also agree that I have never belonged to the elite brainy class at school level, the GATE group at college level and the Microsoft, Google at the professional level yet somehow I have managed to find my way out; maybe not that convincingly. I don’t need a MBA degree for what I do for a living. I also don’t need it for what I wish to do. But the reason why I strive to fare well in this exam is to prove that it’s not luck alone that has carried me over the years. This is my Everest.

I’ve been advised to look for simpler options. Compromise with life and move on. Someone told me once, “IIM? Good! Aim for the stars, at least you will reach the tree top.” Why? Is it not possible to aim for the stars and reach there too? I can’t think of any reason why not. After all they are normal humans who appear for CAT, crack it, reach the IIM’s and fulfill their personal aim. If thousands can do it every year; so can I. More so, I have freed myself from the shackles of time and I don’t care how long it goes on. As long as I have the zeal, the energy to fight it, I will. So let the CAT meow each year, at least once, it would be me who will roar.